Petition to make Joe from princess diaries the new anonymous icon
LET ME TELL YOU SOMETHING ABOUT THIS STUFF
I BOUGHT IT
TRIED IT ONCE
I THOUGHT IT WAS HORRIBLE
IT WAS STICKY AND CEMENTED MY LIPS TOGETHER
IT GOT ON EVERYTHING
IT DIDN’T SUPER-STAY
I THREW IT INTO MY DRAWER WITHOUT ANOTHER THOUGHT
AND THEN OUT OF THE BLUE I DECIDED TO TRY IT AGAIN
HOPE IN MY HEART, PEACE IN MY SOUL, I DECIDED TO TRY IT AGAIN
I READ THE DIRECTIONS
AND ALL OF A SUDDEN, I SAW THE LIGHT
I COULD SEE CLEARLY NOW, THE RAIN WAS GONE
YOU HAVE TO PUT THE RED STUFF ON FIRST
WAIT FOR IT TO DRY
COMPLETELY (I MISSED THIS STEP BEFORE)
IT SHOULD BE SO DRY AND IF YOU KISS THE BACK OF YOUR HAND, NO MARK SHOULD SHOW
AND THEN I PUT THE BALM ON (I ORIGINALLY TRIED PUTTING THE BALM ON FIRST…. DON’T DO THAT.)
AND IT GOT RID OF ALL THE STICKINESS
AND THE RED DOESN’T EVEN GET ALL UP IN THE WHITE BALM
IT WAS A MIRACLE
THIS STUFF IS THE FUCKING BEST
IT STAYS ON FOR A REALLY LONG TIME
IT DOESN’T GET ON ANYTHING
AMAZING I WANT TO BUY THIS IN FORTY SHADES OKAY I ENCOURAGE YOU ALL TO TRY IT
NO BUT DO KEEP IN MIND THAT IT REALLY DOES STAY ON FOR A VERY VERY LONG TIME
AS IN, LONG ENOUGH TO FORCE YOU TO SCRUB IT OFF AT THE END OF THE DAY
THIS STUFF ISN’T FOR THE WEAK, THIS IS FOR THE POWERFUL BADASSES WHO WASH THE BLOOD OF THEIR ENEMIES OUT OF THEIR CLOTHES AT THE END OF THE DAY LIKE ITS NOTHING
IF YOU RUB TOOTHPASTE ON YOUR LIPS IT COMES OFF EASIER
YES THIS IS A GOOD TIP I HAVE HAD THIS EXPERIENCE
GIVE IT A LIL SCRUB WITH THE OL’ PEARLY WHITE RUB A DUB DUB
IT WILL COME OFF
IT WILL DO AS YOU COMMAND
THIS MAKEUP O B E Y S
IT S T A Y S
Are fedoras really that bad?
YES YES THEY ARE
I don’t really believe this mumbo jumbo
I mean it’s a goddamn hat.
The white rose, it symbolizes the unique beauty of all the women who wish not to be with a nice guy such as myse-
I wonder if this works with other kinds of hat…
Nothing ventured, nothing gained…
WHEEEN THE MOON HITS YOUR EYE LIKE A BIG PIZZA PIE THAT’S AMORREEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE
ITS HERE AGAIN
you fucking salmon
I’d never, ever hurt a lady but I’d be happy to punch a feminist.
It’d bring me great joy.
I’m 6’2 and weigh 180lbs
ready when you are
Or if you’d like to have some more options….
and have 9 years of combined martial arts training and 3 years of being a Line Backer in football.
Just in case you are looking for variety.
what about a lady and a feminist. warning, combatives certified soldier.
You remember that song 1985 by bowling for soup
That’s going to be me in 20 years except it’s going to be called 2005
Good Charlotte, Gorillaz
Way before Ed Sheeran
There was Paramore and P!ATD
And Pimp My Ride on mtv
WHAT THE FUCK IS WRONG WITH STRAIGHT BOYS
holy shit why do men talk like this
This makes me feel better about my social skills.
Purpose: If you’re ever feeling down about yourself, mist yourself with this Self-Love Spray.
Materials: A spray bottle (alternatively, you can use a regular bottle and simply dab the mixture on yourself); 12 fresh rose petals; lavender essential oil; a lemon; a pot/cauldron; a stove, fire,…